Jason Steele: How much 'Sex' can one person take?

[FernLaplante]

How much 'Sex' can one person take?
by Jason Steele

I have a love/hate relationship with "Sex and the City."

I loved the TV show but hated the first movie. So I was a bit concerned about the "SATC2" movie that opened last week; would this film be better or worse than the first?

I had seen most of the episodes of "SATC" when it aired on HBO from 1998 to 2004. Say what you will about SJP's constant puns, Samantha's over-the-top sexcapades and the girls' drag queen-inspired wardrobes, it's a fun way to pass 25 minutes of your day--except when the character of Mr. Big in on screen, and that's where my apprehension begins.

For those not familiar with "SATC," it's basically four gay men in the guise of four sexually progressive women, and when the series ended I found myself missing these trollops. So when the first movie came out two years ago, I, along with most women and many gay men, found myself in the theater opening weekend waiting to see what Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte had been up to.

Man, was I disappointed! Most of my anger was due to Mr. Big's treatment of our beloved Carrie Bradshaw. What appeared onscreen (Samantha living in L.A., Miranda having problems with Steve, Carrie still wasting her life on Big as he stomped all over her heart, Charlotte pooping her pants in Mexico) did not live up to my ending. I wondered if I would be disappointed again.

(Cue the Carrie-esque voiceover): Do I focus too much energy on these faux relationships and not enough on my real ones?

My friend Karen has only seen the TV show in reruns on TBS. The edited version. That means she has an oddly chaste view of these four sexually experienced women. When I have referenced something racy from the show, Karen looks at me blankly because she never saw the female ejaculation scene or Miranda's classic "tookus lingus" scene or any number of things I can't mention here. In fact, thanks to the edited version, I wonder if Karen even knows who Samantha is.

Karen doesn't want to see her good girls go bad and I don't want to see my bad girls get worse.

My hope going into the sequel last weekend was for the film to open with a Carrie voiceover: "It's been one year since Big died of excessive smarminess ..." That would open the door for her to get back together with Aidan.

So there I was, a boy from Boystown who sees a little bit of Carrie, a little bit of Miranda, a little bit of Charlotte and a lot of Samantha in himself sitting in the theater watching our middle-aged girls get it on in the Middle East. And it was two-and-a half hours of ... meh. And the worst part is that Big lives.

Well, there's always hope for "Sex and the City 3."

Source: RedEye - Reprinted with Author's Permission